Home Study Class Sessions 2 & 3 of 5

This week we attended 2 more of home study classes (session 2 & 3).  They were emotional days!

Session 2 dealt with talking about infertility, openness and birthparents.

Infertility was a difficult topic to talk about as not everyone in the class is there because of infertility but it is part of the adoption process that is required to be discussed because for some it is the reason for their adoption.  There are similar feelings that can be associated with infertility and the inability to conceive, here are just a few:

• That it is the most devastating thing that we will ever experience.
• That is it emotionally draining.
• That it changes our lives forever-we will never be the same people that we once were
• That is is a life-altering experience  

Without birthparents there would be no adoptions!

In regards to the topic of open adoption we talked about; what it means, building relationships with birthparents and read stories and watched videos about birthparents.
  
Open Adoptions: open adoptions are those in which both the birthparents and the adopting parents are actively involved in all phases of the adoption process.  Rather than social workers, doctors or lawyers, those most deeply involved - the birthparents and the adoption parents - have power over all the critical decisions.
In open adoption, the birthparents select the new parents for their child.  They meet them in person and share full identifying information (full names and addresses).  They have the option of ongoing contact over the years, either in person or through correspondence.  The type and frequency of this contact is based on the mutual needs of birthparents and adopting parents, as well as the needs of the adopted child.

"Bithparents wrap their child in love and entrust that child to a forever family."  -J Weber

In the birthparent section covered the Truths in Adoption:

• Adoption is a lifelong process for all triad members (The adoption triad is the adopted child, the bithfamily and the adoptive family)
• Adoption is the lifelong commitment between the birthfamily and adoptive family in maintaining an extended family relationship.
• Choosing to place a child for adoption is a parental decision, just as choosing to adopt a child is a parental decision.
• When you adopt a child, you are welcoming their birthfamily into your life whether they are physically present or not.
• Once a child is placed, the greatest gift that birthparents and adaptive parents can give the child id to love and respect each other.

We also discussed the match meeting and post adoption/openness agreements (a non-bonding document that will detail; how and when contact and communication will be handled following finalization of the adoption).

Session 3 was a short evening session were we heard adoption stories from 2 sets of adoptive parents and 1 birthmother.  Each stories was unique, emotional and SUCCESSFUL!  It gave us hope that our dream of having a family will come true!

Sorry that this got long, there is just so much to share.  Thanks for all your prayers and support!

Home Study Class Session 1 of 5

Thursday, July 19th marked the first day of our Adoption Home Study Classes.  There are 3 other couples in the class with us.  After a short getting to know you game we had a review of the adoption process and of the fees that are due and when they will be due (we are now accepting donation!)  We watched a video aboutadoptions then and now it talked about how adoptions were viewed by society and how they happened; birth mothers were not allowed to choose the family that would raise the child and all adoptions were closed, meaning the birth family and adoptive family had no contact.  The video also focus on the changes that have occurred in adoptions; now almost all adoption are open, the birth mother/family choose the couple/family that will raise the child and they have contact with the adoptive family through letters, pictures, videos, phone call and even face to face visits. 

We discussed some of the "homework" projects we need to completed before our home study visit takes place; writing a resume letter (a short letter telling the birth mothers/families about us, birth families will read this letter and possibly choose us as family they would like to meet and hopefully select as the family to adopt their child), creating a portfolio (a scrapbook full of pictures that tells the story our lives together), we have 2 books to read and other paperwork to complete.  The home study visit will be scheduled on the last day of class and will take place about 4 -6 weeks after our classes have ending, then within 2 weeks of the home study being approved our resume will be available for birth mothers/families to read

The session ended with another video that featured birth mothers and families telling their stories of why they chose adoption and the relationships they have with the adoptive families and the child they chose to have adopted. It was very emotional.

I will continue to keep you all posted as we continue our journey to find our "forever family".  I ask that you all say an extra prayer for us, the families that are unable to have their own children and those that are in the process of adopting and for the birth mothers/families, that they have the strength, guidance and courage to make the right decision not only for their child  but for themselves too.