Yeah!! We did it!! Our home study is complete!! Our caseworker came to our house today and completed the home study that will make us foster care approved, foster care licensing is required for adoption placement and only needs to be adhered to until the adoption is finalized (about 6 months after placement). We started out by handing over and reviewing our resume letters (10 copies, each with a photo and our signatures) and portfolio books (2 identical books, one copy will go into our file and one copy will go to the birthmother that chooses us, but right now these books will go to a library and wait for a birthmother to request to take a closer look at us), it was hard to part with these because of all the time spent working on them. I did make a color copy for ourselves (which I am using to create our child's adoption storybook), but it's not the same as the same as having the original. We then reviewed the results of our Prepare and Enrich Assessment, which we passed! Our caseworker reviewed and took other paperwork we were required to complete; one was a form telling a little more about us and the other told them the type of infant we are looking to adopt (age, sex, race, what type of medical issues we may be open to, if we would be accepting of a birthmother and father with a history of smoking/drinking/drugs, our plans for child care and how much time we plan to take off from work, what type of interests and hobbies we will expose our child to and more!), and our recent tax return. Our birth certificates and marriage licenses were viewed and we were asked our thoughts on the process we have been through thus far and if we had any questions regarding any of the processes we have been though and will be going through. We them took our caseworker on a tour of our home and she completed her report for the foster license. We will officially be on the waiting list in about 2 weeks, it will take about a month for us to get the official letter and foster care certificate in the mail; our worker admitted to being a little slow on getting the letter and certificate mailed out and that our resume letter will be in the wait book before we get the official word.
So now we wait! It may be awhile before you see more posts since we don't know how long the waiting process will be (they tell us anywhere from 2 months to 2 years!). I will keep you up to date as I know more, for now we just wait and pray!
Keep us all those involved in adoption in your thoughts and prayers!
Jenny
Monday, August 20, 2012
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
Home Study Class Session 5 of 5
Well we did it! We made it thru the home study classes! It's taken me awhile to get the time to post an update about or last session, the classes and paperwork took over our lives for so long, I/we have been busy catching up on lives (but the paperwork is still not finished).
Our final class covered more cultural issues, resource/support available to us, post placement, a wrap up and finally the scheduling our home visit!
The waiting game will soon begin! We have our home visit scheduled for August 20th! (13 days away!) To prepare for this home visit we were given a 68+ page printout covering the Wisconsin Administrative Code/Chapter 56 for Foster Home Care for Child (we must follow this code until our placement is finalized). This information is suppose to prepare us for our home visit, a lot of the info went right over the top of my head. I think we are just going to wing the visit and hope for the best. Basically we were told she (our case worker/social worker) will be looking to make sure we have enough space to bring a child into our home and that our home is safe. Once our visit is complete we will be approved and added to the wait list.
We were given a list of things we can do to keep ourselves occupied while we wait. Here are just a few of them: keep your employer updated, search for a pediatrician and child care provider (while under the foster care rules this must me a certified and or licensed provider or family member), take an expectant parent class, set up the nursery, do all the thing we have wanted to do as a couple (that won't be as easy to do once we have a child) and finally make it a happy time!!
So currently we are in the process of finishing our resume letter, portfolio letter and portfolio. I have re-written my resume and portfolio letter several time, I think I finally have it worded properly and hopefully it is perfect! We can only refer to ourselves as Travis and Jenny, no last names, no addresses or telling of where we live or distinguishable landmarks. It's harder than you think, I have over used the word "we", can't use the word "I" (because this letter needs to be from both us), and sometime it sounded like I was referring to myself and Travis in the third person. I'll be sooooo glad when the letter is finally out of my hands and I can't scrutinize it anymore! The portfolio is going well, but I am getting a little tired of looking at and sorting thru pictures. We completed our Enrich and Prepare Assessment, an online course that questioned us on all aspects of life from our relationship and parenting to finical and stress issues. It was over 200 questions! and will be reviewed at our home study. We also went and had our fingerprinting done, we both lucked out and did not get thrown behind bars :).
Well I'll close now and update more after our home visit. Say a prayer tonight for our birthmother, she is out there somewhere needing the Lords guidance to make the right decision for her unborn child. And pray for us and all the other waiting families that our waits will be short.
Jenny
Our final class covered more cultural issues, resource/support available to us, post placement, a wrap up and finally the scheduling our home visit!
The waiting game will soon begin! We have our home visit scheduled for August 20th! (13 days away!) To prepare for this home visit we were given a 68+ page printout covering the Wisconsin Administrative Code/Chapter 56 for Foster Home Care for Child (we must follow this code until our placement is finalized). This information is suppose to prepare us for our home visit, a lot of the info went right over the top of my head. I think we are just going to wing the visit and hope for the best. Basically we were told she (our case worker/social worker) will be looking to make sure we have enough space to bring a child into our home and that our home is safe. Once our visit is complete we will be approved and added to the wait list.
We were given a list of things we can do to keep ourselves occupied while we wait. Here are just a few of them: keep your employer updated, search for a pediatrician and child care provider (while under the foster care rules this must me a certified and or licensed provider or family member), take an expectant parent class, set up the nursery, do all the thing we have wanted to do as a couple (that won't be as easy to do once we have a child) and finally make it a happy time!!
So currently we are in the process of finishing our resume letter, portfolio letter and portfolio. I have re-written my resume and portfolio letter several time, I think I finally have it worded properly and hopefully it is perfect! We can only refer to ourselves as Travis and Jenny, no last names, no addresses or telling of where we live or distinguishable landmarks. It's harder than you think, I have over used the word "we", can't use the word "I" (because this letter needs to be from both us), and sometime it sounded like I was referring to myself and Travis in the third person. I'll be sooooo glad when the letter is finally out of my hands and I can't scrutinize it anymore! The portfolio is going well, but I am getting a little tired of looking at and sorting thru pictures. We completed our Enrich and Prepare Assessment, an online course that questioned us on all aspects of life from our relationship and parenting to finical and stress issues. It was over 200 questions! and will be reviewed at our home study. We also went and had our fingerprinting done, we both lucked out and did not get thrown behind bars :).
Well I'll close now and update more after our home visit. Say a prayer tonight for our birthmother, she is out there somewhere needing the Lords guidance to make the right decision for her unborn child. And pray for us and all the other waiting families that our waits will be short.
Jenny
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
Home Study Class Session 4 of 5
This session covered:
Adoption Issues:
Tomorrow is our last class! We will schedule our home visit be fore we leave; it will take place within the next 4-6 weeks. We (I) have been busy writing resume letters and creating our portfolio; these item and some other paper work need to be completed and turned in at our home study. Once our home study is approved we start the waiting game; it will take any where from 2 months to 2 years be fore we could be selected by a birth family.
Please keep us, the birth families and other adoptive families in your thoughts and prayers; we are all in need of them!
Adoption Issues:
- Responding to outsider questions; deciding what to share (not all questions need to be answered)
- Lifelong issues in adoption
- Family building; bonding and attachment
- Transracial/cultural adoption
- Preparing yourself (the adoptive parent)
- Preparing family and friend (adoption is a process how your child joined your family, not how they should be described).
- Becoming a parent
- Stages of development
- Child/parent behaviors
- Listening/Setting limits
- Healthy adoptive parenting
- Stress busters for adoptive parents
- Success factors for adoptive parents
- Parents Rights
- Bill of Rights for Adoptee
- Talking about adoption with children
Tomorrow is our last class! We will schedule our home visit be fore we leave; it will take place within the next 4-6 weeks. We (I) have been busy writing resume letters and creating our portfolio; these item and some other paper work need to be completed and turned in at our home study. Once our home study is approved we start the waiting game; it will take any where from 2 months to 2 years be fore we could be selected by a birth family.
Please keep us, the birth families and other adoptive families in your thoughts and prayers; we are all in need of them!
Thursday, July 26, 2012
Home Study Class Sessions 2 & 3 of 5
This week we attended 2 more of home study classes (session 2 & 3). They were emotional days!
Session 2 dealt with talking about infertility, openness and birthparents.
Infertility was a difficult topic to talk about as not everyone in the class is there because of infertility but it is part of the adoption process that is required to be discussed because for some it is the reason for their adoption. There are similar feelings that can be associated with infertility and the inability to conceive, here are just a few:
In regards to the topic of open adoption we talked about; what it means, building relationships with birthparents and read stories and watched videos about birthparents.
Open Adoptions: open adoptions are those in which both the birthparents and the adopting parents are actively involved in all phases of the adoption process. Rather than social workers, doctors or lawyers, those most deeply involved - the birthparents and the adoption parents - have power over all the critical decisions.
In open adoption, the birthparents select the new parents for their child. They meet them in person and share full identifying information (full names and addresses). They have the option of ongoing contact over the years, either in person or through correspondence. The type and frequency of this contact is based on the mutual needs of birthparents and adopting parents, as well as the needs of the adopted child.
"Bithparents wrap their child in love and entrust that child to a forever family." -J Weber
In the birthparent section covered the Truths in Adoption:
Session 3 was a short evening session were we heard adoption stories from 2 sets of adoptive parents and 1 birthmother. Each stories was unique, emotional and SUCCESSFUL! It gave us hope that our dream of having a family will come true!
Sorry that this got long, there is just so much to share. Thanks for all your prayers and support!
Session 2 dealt with talking about infertility, openness and birthparents.
Infertility was a difficult topic to talk about as not everyone in the class is there because of infertility but it is part of the adoption process that is required to be discussed because for some it is the reason for their adoption. There are similar feelings that can be associated with infertility and the inability to conceive, here are just a few:
- That it is the most devastating thing that we will ever experience.
- That is it emotionally draining.
- That it changes our lives forever-we will never be the same people that we once were
- That is is a life-altering experience
In regards to the topic of open adoption we talked about; what it means, building relationships with birthparents and read stories and watched videos about birthparents.
Open Adoptions: open adoptions are those in which both the birthparents and the adopting parents are actively involved in all phases of the adoption process. Rather than social workers, doctors or lawyers, those most deeply involved - the birthparents and the adoption parents - have power over all the critical decisions.
In open adoption, the birthparents select the new parents for their child. They meet them in person and share full identifying information (full names and addresses). They have the option of ongoing contact over the years, either in person or through correspondence. The type and frequency of this contact is based on the mutual needs of birthparents and adopting parents, as well as the needs of the adopted child.
"Bithparents wrap their child in love and entrust that child to a forever family." -J Weber
In the birthparent section covered the Truths in Adoption:
- Adoption is a lifelong process for all triad members (The adoption triad is the adopted child, the bithfamily and the adoptive family)
- Adoption is the lifelong commitment between the birthfamily and adoptive family in maintaining an extended family relationship.
- Choosing to place a child for adoption is a parental decision, just as choosing to adopt a child is a parental decision.
- When you adopt a child, you are welcoming their birthfamily into your life whether they are physically present or not.
- Once a child is placed, the greatest gift that birthparents and adaptive parents can give the child id to love and respect each other.
Session 3 was a short evening session were we heard adoption stories from 2 sets of adoptive parents and 1 birthmother. Each stories was unique, emotional and SUCCESSFUL! It gave us hope that our dream of having a family will come true!
Sorry that this got long, there is just so much to share. Thanks for all your prayers and support!
Friday, July 20, 2012
Home Study Class Session 1 of 5
Thursday, July 19th marked the first day of our Adoption Home Study Classes. There are 3 other couples in the class with us. After a short getting to know you game we had a review of the adoption process and of the fees that are due and when they will be due (we are now accepting donation!) We watched a video aboutadoptions then and now it talked about how adoptions were viewed by society and how they happened; birth mothers were not allowed to choose the family that would raise the child and all adoptions were closed, meaning the birth family and adoptive family had no contact. The video also focus on the changes that have occurred in adoptions; now almost all adoption are open, the birth mother/family choose the couple/family that will raise the child and they have contact with the adoptive family through letters, pictures, videos, phone call and even face to face visits.
We discussed some of the "homework" projects we need to completed before our home study visit takes place; writing a resume letter (a short letter telling the birth mothers/families about us, birth families will read this letter and possibly choose us as family they would like to meet and hopefully select as the family to adopt their child), creating a portfolio (a scrapbook full of pictures that tells the story our lives together), we have 2 books to read and other paperwork to complete. The home study visit will be scheduled on the last day of class and will take place about 4 -6 weeks after our classes have ending, then within 2 weeks of the home study being approved our resume will be available for birth mothers/families to read
The session ended with another video that featured birth mothers and families telling their stories of why they chose adoption and the relationships they have with the adoptive families and the child they chose to have adopted. It was very emotional.
I will continue to keep you all posted as we continue our journey to find our "forever family". I ask that you all say an extra prayer for us, the families that are unable to have their own children and those that are in the process of adopting and for the birth mothers/families, that they have the strength, guidance and courage to make the right decision not only for their child but for themselves too.
We discussed some of the "homework" projects we need to completed before our home study visit takes place; writing a resume letter (a short letter telling the birth mothers/families about us, birth families will read this letter and possibly choose us as family they would like to meet and hopefully select as the family to adopt their child), creating a portfolio (a scrapbook full of pictures that tells the story our lives together), we have 2 books to read and other paperwork to complete. The home study visit will be scheduled on the last day of class and will take place about 4 -6 weeks after our classes have ending, then within 2 weeks of the home study being approved our resume will be available for birth mothers/families to read
The session ended with another video that featured birth mothers and families telling their stories of why they chose adoption and the relationships they have with the adoptive families and the child they chose to have adopted. It was very emotional.
I will continue to keep you all posted as we continue our journey to find our "forever family". I ask that you all say an extra prayer for us, the families that are unable to have their own children and those that are in the process of adopting and for the birth mothers/families, that they have the strength, guidance and courage to make the right decision not only for their child but for themselves too.
Sunday, May 20, 2012
One Step Closer...
We are open step closer to starting a family! We received our letter in the mail with the dates for our home study education (Between July 19th & August 2nd) we will attend 3 all day sessions and 2 half day sessions. We are excited to start this journey and share the story with our family and friends. Thanks to everyone for your support so far.
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Paper work Submitted!!
We took the first step towards our adoption! We dropped of the application paper work necessary to open our file. Now we need to wait and see when we can start the education/group study, more than likely we will have to wait for the summer session (starts in July) we were told that the spring session is filled up already. For now we just need to wait and see.
Monday, February 6, 2012
The begining...
We are excited to share with you all a new journey we will be experiencing in our lives! We have been selected by LSS (Lutheran Social Services) for a adoption study!
Here is a brief explanation of what we will be experiencing:
We are in the process of completing an application, background checks, references and more.
Once the application paper work is submitted we will be going thru a 5 session education process; some of the things we will learn is how to create a resume and profile that will be used to "market" us to birth families, we will learn more about open adoption and hear stories and experiences from birth families that have experienced adoption first hand, we will also go thru a process of having our home foster care approved; the foster care approval is required by the state and is only good until our adoption is finalized.
After we have completed the education classes we will start the home study process. Once we receive foster care approval our resume will be available for birth families to view, if they like our story they will be able to request our portfolio; which is a collection of pictures that will portray our life. If the still like what they see they will request a match meeting; we will receive information about the birth mother and family and set up a time to meet face to face. Both parties will decide if each other is the family they want to proceed with. This part of the adoption process could take 2 months to 2 years.
When the baby is born the birth family will need to terminate their parental rights before we can bring the baby home. In the interim of the baby being born and coming to live with us the baby will either go home with the birth family or into bridge care. It can take 2 -6 weeks for the birth family to terminate their parental rights, once they legally terminate their rights we can bring the baby home and start our lives as a family. LSS will "follow" us for 6 months; we will have 3 - 4 home visits and "sharing sheets" to complete. we will then go to court and have our adoption finalized!
My goal is to use this blog to keep you all up to date on our experience.
Here is a brief explanation of what we will be experiencing:
We are in the process of completing an application, background checks, references and more.
Once the application paper work is submitted we will be going thru a 5 session education process; some of the things we will learn is how to create a resume and profile that will be used to "market" us to birth families, we will learn more about open adoption and hear stories and experiences from birth families that have experienced adoption first hand, we will also go thru a process of having our home foster care approved; the foster care approval is required by the state and is only good until our adoption is finalized.
After we have completed the education classes we will start the home study process. Once we receive foster care approval our resume will be available for birth families to view, if they like our story they will be able to request our portfolio; which is a collection of pictures that will portray our life. If the still like what they see they will request a match meeting; we will receive information about the birth mother and family and set up a time to meet face to face. Both parties will decide if each other is the family they want to proceed with. This part of the adoption process could take 2 months to 2 years.
When the baby is born the birth family will need to terminate their parental rights before we can bring the baby home. In the interim of the baby being born and coming to live with us the baby will either go home with the birth family or into bridge care. It can take 2 -6 weeks for the birth family to terminate their parental rights, once they legally terminate their rights we can bring the baby home and start our lives as a family. LSS will "follow" us for 6 months; we will have 3 - 4 home visits and "sharing sheets" to complete. we will then go to court and have our adoption finalized!
My goal is to use this blog to keep you all up to date on our experience.
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